,A while back I went to a lecture at CRS presented by Hideko Yamashita, who talked about this concept of Dan Sha Ri. Not knowing what to expect it turned out to be one of the most enriching lectures I have attended and one that I will always remember.
Dan Sha Ri written in with three characters means to refuse, to discard and to separate. The refusal is that ability to deny things that we do not really need added into our home or lifestyle. To discard, is to be able to free yourself from those things that may be limiting your space in the home, or subliminally binding you from progressing forward. For example, with our tokens of honor, such as trophies, if we cling too tightly, we may be interfering with our growth process, by holding on to the past and denying new accomplishments to manifest. And finally to mentally and emotionally separate accordingly and organize oneself into what is essential for living a healthy balanced life.
A great question from a woman came up about a gift she received from her aunty. She had Japanese dolls that were costly and valuable, yet it occupied a good portion of space in her home. Hideko responded by saying that we can be gracious for the gifts from our loved ones but when we keep them in the home and it is intruding on the living space, we are not really living for ourselves but living for the other person.
These three characters on a deeper emotional level Hideko says, is the act of 'deciding, releasing and leaving stressful situations and things behind. It is about renewing the heart space and transforming the mind.’
I believe that self-care is not only about staying physically fit, eating healthy, and getting a good nights sleep but it's also taking stock of what we truly value and releasing that which does not serve us in this moment of our life. And it not limited to just material things, but also our relationships, our job, and/or our emotional addictions.
The process of honoring our truth and making conscious decisions is a constant work in progress as we are by human design, ever changing.
Choose that which will make space for you to be free to live your best self.
These past couple of months I met with three different friends that had just lost a loved one. It's never easy to accept the impermanence of our lives and our loved ones but I believe the soul is the evergreen that continues on. While in conversation with one of my friends, I told her that the way I see it is that, 'she just left the party earlier than you did, and I feel you will see her again later.'
We all have tendencies to hold on to people, and things so tightly that we forget that life is constantly evolving and cycling. Nothing really stays the same no mater how hard we wish for it. The changing agent is not just about the new, the birth, the growth, but also about the end, the death.
Here is a beautiful story that helps me to remember impermanence.
The story is told of an American tourist who visited the 19th century Polish rabbi, Hofetz Chaim. Astonished to see that the rabbi's home was only a simple room filled with books, plus a table and a bench, the tourist asked, "Rabbi, where is your furniture?"